With so many unique aspects and decisions that go into deciding where you might want to travel, it’s important for members of the LGBTQ+ community to know how to stay safe across different locations with varying degrees of tolerance.
Traveling may be an escape, but it also often comes with a fair amount of planning stress–be that finding the best deal, booking your time off, or organizing a friend group. For members of the LGBTQ+ community, this planning stress–unfortunately–can prove quite important. There are many destinations where LGBTQ+ people are not afforded equal rights legally, or where acceptance is not widespread. More information on how to travel–both to LGBTQ+ inclusive destinations and not–can empower LGBTQ+ travelers to make decisions that lead to the most comfortable and safe experience.
Why Travel to Somewhere That Isn’t LGBTQ+ Friendly?
While traveling to countries that have anti-LBGTQ+ laws or social views has the potential to be unwelcoming or outright dangerous, it’s difficult to prescribe avoiding these places completely. Simply put: the unfortunate truth of the matter is, you never truly know when you might meet an unwelcoming face, even somewhere that’s deemed ”friendly.”
Some LGBTQ+ and allied individuals may want to avoid visiting destinations like this because they don’t want their economic contribution to go towards a destination with anti-LGBTQ+ laws, or because the reason for their travel doesn’t suit an unfriendly place for LGBTQ+ couples (a honeymoon, for example, may not feel like the right time to strike out at a known country for being hostile). Others within the community, however, might not want to feel constricted and want to travel to more well-known or historic places known to have more anti-LBGTQ+ sentiments, learning what queer life can look like in other parts of the world.
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After all, the LGBTQ+ community is an incredibly diverse group of people with different intersectional identities–just considering travel, among us will be solo travelers, those who splurge on a cruise, backpacking groups, and those who are travelling on their honeymoon. With so many unique aspects and decisions that go into deciding where you might want to travel, it’s important for members of the LGBTQ+ community to know how to stay safe across different locations with varying degrees of tolerance.
However, it’s important to point out that advice on how to stay safe is not a substitute for researching your specific destination with your own unique concerns and circumstances. Every country is different, and some regions even within the same country can be safer for LGBTQ+ people than others. Laws and attitudes can impact the safety of LGBTQ+ people, but our own circumstances and identity can also affect the way we see safety in different destinations around the world.
How to Check Into a Hotel With Your Partner
Before we even think about checking into a hotel, research is key. It’s important to remember that there may be different cultural standards and norms for expressing gender with clothing and fashion. Particularly for people who are gender non-conforming, there can be a difficult balance to strike between enjoying your trip and compromising your safety. Knowing these expectations and deciding on your own comfort levels when sticking to these local customs will help you decide the safest course of action for your personal travel plans, so you can be best prepared before you’ve even touched down. Similarly, it’s always worth being prepared for an emergency before you travel, making sure that you have emergency contact numbers in place and an emergency card hidden.
Once you reach your destination, checking into a hotel as a same-sex couple in a country or area that is known to not be LGBTQ+ friendly largely depends on one’s comfort levels and ability to “pass,” both as cisgender and/or heterosexual. Married couples who share the same last name could opt to check in as family, for example, while those who don’t share the same last name could opt to check-in as friends, if asked, or even book completely separately if you and your partner feel the need to be extra careful. If you’re comfortable and capable of “passing” and are happy to keep your sexual orientation private, this could be the best option when travelling to destinations with anti-LBGTQ+ laws and attitudes.
However, just because a country or area has anti-LBGTQ+ laws and wider attitudes, it does not mean that everywhere is unwelcome to LGBTQ+ people. Many places have an underground LGBTQ+ scene, so searching for LGBTQ+ welcoming accommodation or tour groups that can assist in planning safe and welcoming travel can be a good place to start with your research. Word of mouth and friends you trust can also help out here.
For example, the Mister and Art House is the first guesthouse in India created exclusively for gay men–there’s no pretending to be straight, or concerns over asking for a double bed here–while Misterb&b, similar to Airbnb, offers options for entire homes, rooms, or apartments, with added assurance that the owners or hosts are part of the LGBTQ+ community. Another option is checking the Corporate Equality Index, which is released and updated annually by the Human Rights Campaign. This evaluates how well a company treats its LGBTQ+ employees, which can give an indication of how much of a welcoming experience you might get as a customer.
Overall, sexual orientation and gender identity are complex topics with a variety of differing opinions across the world, so it can be difficult to be completely certain of safety when travelling–trans people in particular are often at great risk right now, and whether a place is ”safe” or not is never completely clear-cut. Researching in advance, connecting with local LGBTQ+ groups to ask for recommendations, and making sure you’re checking in with how comfortable you’re feeling is the best way to access traveling as a member of the LGBTQ+ community. Happy travels!
