I’ve thought a lot about the time I made this image. In my 20s, I was living in New York. Then I broke up with my long-term partner in 2019 and I sort of didn’t really know how to cope any more. I didn’t feel creative – my whole experience of living in New York was tied to that relationship, and I felt I needed to go somewhere else and start over. I moved to Austin, Texas – I thought I’d give it a go for a bit.
I was doing a lot of tinkering at home, and I started doing a lot more self-portraits and let my psyche run wild. At this point, in 2021, one of my friends, Mike, was living in a 1940s building in East Austin, with old popcorn ceilings, really cool mouldings and outlet covers and original details, including the fireplace. It was inspiring to be there.
I wasn’t thinking about what would be popular – though it did get a big reaction on social media
I was having a bad day and I called Mike to ask if I could come over with my tripod. I knew I wanted to shoot with the fireplace, but I was unclear what the idea was. I am always balanced between these two modes in my practice – between knowing exactly what I’m doing and not. The fireplace was set up pretty much exactly as you see it in this image, I just switched out the bowling trophy he had on the mantelpiece for an artwork that I took from his bathroom. I was thinking about how I was relearning as an adult, and the old lesson people tell kids: “Don’t play with fire.” That’s where the title of the image came from – Learned a Lesson Then Forgot It.
There is a lot of tension but also grace in the image. Mike had recently taken in a stray kitten and she kept getting in the photo, but her curiosity conveyed the right message. People often want to know about her, and whether she’s real or Photoshopped in.
I shot a lot of different versions of the pose – I have around 24 outtakes. Whenever I make an image in a compromising position, I assess the discomfort before I get naked. In this case the pose was extreme, my back hurt for a few days after. But I wanted to make a perfect square with my body. I often come up with poses in response to the space I’m working in. During that first year in Austin, I became more controlled in my process. I would have the idea of a composition but still leave room for how I used to work – spontaneously and reacting to space, working with whatever I had available, having fun.
It’s a special image to me now. I’ve since moved back to New York and I think fondly of that period, even though it was really difficult too. I felt really alive. In the New York scene, there is a lot of competitiveness and constant comparison, and it felt good to disconnect from it and hang out somewhere where the pace was different. I could get into a friend’s fireplace and it didn’t matter if it didn’t work out!
There was a lot of emotion in this work. I wasn’t thinking about what would be popular – though it ended up getting a big reaction I did not expect on social media. I think people connect with work that lets them create their own narrative. They react to this pose and it’s an image that leaves a lot of room for interpretation.
Brooke DiDonato’s CV
Born: Canton, Ohio, 1990
High point: Completing my first book this year. Much of my career has been online, so proofing the book was my first time seeing many of the photographs in print.
Top tip: Don’t be afraid to repeat yourself. Sometimes creativity is not a new idea but just the practice of revisiting the same places, people and objects over and over again. Even if they seem as though they don’t change, the way you see them will.
Brooke DiDonato: Take a Picture, It Will Last Longer is published by Thames and Hudson on 29 January.
